MULLINGS
Easterine Kire
[dropcap]L[/dropcap]ast Saturday there were two funerals. Two mothers had completed their earthly journeys. Two sets of families would never be the same again.
Apfo Khrieü Sekhose went home on Friday night. Apfo’s life warrants a book, or even two. She lived the meaning of her name to its fullest. Her name means ‘to love’ or ‘to be loved.’ In many homes there will be found lasting mementoes of her loving ways. Every Christmas she would send woollen scarves to neighbours and family members to warm themselves against the winter cold.
Until the year of her long illness, she regularly sent milk and food items to families in need. Apfo’s amazing gift of sharing was like the widow’s cask of oil in the times of Elijah. The giver never ran out of gifts. Even as she shared with others, her gifts seemed to multiply and there were always more to give out.It is hard to imagine a world without Apfo. She was part of all my shared memories of childhood. At the birthday parties that she threw for her children, I was a regular guest. We were fed well, and the games we played would last long into the evening until we reluctantly left for home.
One of the first Naga musicians, Apfo’s house was often filled with the strains of the hymns she loved to play. There is a scene imprinted on my mind when I think of her - sunshine filtering into the room as she plays a beloved hymn. I think that is a metaphor for the way she lived her life. She ushered in a silent music into people’s lives by reaching out and loving them.
An aunt who was a frequent recipient of Apfo’s generosity would say, “Khrieü sü Khrieü ketho touzo,” meaning that Apfo truly lived up to her name of caring for others.
There were other things that Apfo loved – her cultural heritage and everything that was positive about that culture. Had we been a more developed society, people like Apfo with her great cultural knowledge would have been designated as national treasures. Not only would her philosophy of life and her cultural knowledge have been preserved for future generations, her wisdom would have been incorporated into guiding the affairs of the community. That did not happen on an official level, nevertheless I hope that her legacy of both spiritual and cultural wealth will live on in her children and grandchildren, in the memories that they have of her, and in her recorded thoughts.
Grief is our natural response to her loss. Indeed we mourn her going, but we would do her an injustice if we did not pause to celebrate her life. What an example of Christian charity and integrity she set before us.
The way Apfo lived her life always made me curious to discover more about her upbringing as a young girl. What were the principles and values inculcated at her home that shaped her unique personality? She had made quite apparent what those values were, in the way she manifested them in her life. They were all good, strong values of a compassionate life, a life lived unto her saviour in service to others.
A couple of hours before Apfo was laid to rest, another funeral was conducted in the family. The last rites for Apfo’s niece by marriage, Vichaneinuo (nee Kire), were performed. Vichaneinuo, affectionately called Neinuo in family circles, was the oldest in their family of six children. A devoted mother and wife, Vichaneinuo was a woman who went through life with a cheerful smile on her face. People who know her will remember it was her genuine smile that first comes to mind. It was a reflection of her inner being. Neinuo drew strength from her relationship with her heavenly father and used it to support her extended family. At weddings, she worked tirelessly behind the scenes. It was characteristic of Neinuo to take on the heavy duties of the Angami kitchen, allowing the host family to look after their many guests. In her quiet way, she was a pillar of strength for the whole family. Her brief battle with cancer has ended her earthly existence. But her short life has been a model of how to live life as a sweet testament to the divine.
Both Apfo and Neinuo were mothers and grandmothers, sisters, daughters and wives. Their lives, so beautifully lived, will remain as testimony and inspiration, and as reminder that every day well lived matters infinitely to God.
