Alice Yhosü
KOHIMA, MAY 10
As many families across the state observe Mother’s Day in their own unique ways, here at Eastern Mirror we look at how mother’s of special needs children celebrate the day.
Mothers hold a special place in everyone’s heart; they are considered the backbone of their family. Mothers often overlook their own needs in their quest to help their children. Their love inspires the confidence that their children need from day to day.
These mothers have to be more patient and deal with issues that most people do not have a clue about. They make sacrifices through the years, committed to love and care for their children who are often taunted and ridiculed. They suffer prejudices of others and are rarely appreciated.
Dr. Asünü Thong, a TB specialist and mother of three, talked about the challenges that she faces as the mother of a 9 year old son who is diagnosed with autism. Trying to help her son, Tejopi understand, communicate and making him comfortable is a daily challenge, she says. Besides that, she also tries to create a balance in everything between her autistic son and her other two normal children. She says she draws strength and support from her husband and they face any difficulty together, with faith in God.
She believes that having Tejopi has made her much stronger as a person. “As a mother, I’ve learned to be more sensitive towards others,” she said.
Mother’s Day-A tribute to mothers of children with special needs
“We are able to appreciate things and have empathy towards those who are struggling.”
She also said it was through her son that she and her husband had decided to start an inclusive playschool in 2010. The school, Jo Foundation, is now recognized by the state education department and currently has 48 students, including 11 children with special needs.
On Mother’s Day each year, Tejopi tries to scribble “something nice” for his mother.
For Toshila Imsong, adjusting the lives of her two sons who suffer from stunted growth with others to live together is her biggest task. “My sons cannot walk and they are prone to sickness, but I am the happiest when they are well and healthy,” she says. She adds that she gets by with the strength from God and support from family and well wishers.
On what her family does on Mother’s Day, she says that her children make it a point to wish her early in the morning and they pray together in thanksgiving. “Every year, they are very eager to know how Mother’s Day is celebrated in the church and how mothers have been honoured. It is touching,” Toshila says. One of her sons, Meren says, “Mother’s Day is very special because, to me, mother is second to God. Mothers care for their children with undying love.”
Mercy (name changed), mother of a 4 year old girl diagnosed with ADHD (attention deficit and hyperactive disorder), is more vocal on the challenges that a mother of a child with special needs faces. “It is very stressful. My daughter is always on the move and up to something every minute of the day,” she says. She cannot leave her daughter even for a brief period unless she has someone reliable to look after her.
Despite all that she does, Mercy still faces criticism just because her daughter is not capable of doing things that her peers can. Towards this, she feels it is partly due to the fact that we live in a society where most people do not have a clue about this particular issue (dealing with the differently abled).
On the things that her daughter does that makes her proud, Mercy states, “When she looks me in the eye and obeys and does the things that I tell her to do.” She is grateful for the support of her loved ones and goes by with the faith that God is in control.
Neikule Doulo, mother of a young autistic child says that as a parent of a child with special need, she draws strength from God knowing that as said in the book of Romans 8:28, she quoted, “In all things God works for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose”.
Talking about challenges, she says that trying to make each day meaningful for her daughter, Veve, though she is unable to communicate, and maintaining a balance in her home so that she gives equal attention to her other three children are what she constantly strives for. “It pains me greatly when my daughter suffers physically as she cannot express herself. This is very difficult for me,” she explained.
Besides her full-time role as a devoted mother to four children, Neikule is also the chairperson for ENABLE, an organization that caters to parents with autistic children, and master franchisee for ALOHA mental arithmetic in Nagaland.
