Many Toppers and Sincere students including the Bible College students went to different parts of India for further studies but they fail to pursue on with their studies and returned home with great discouragement. Hence, there is a great need for the parents to diagnose the reality behind this tragedy. Let us find out the root cause and heal the sickness before it is too late.
1. 4-18 years of age:
Parents send their children to School at the age of 4 (which seem to be early) nevertheless with their own choice they keep their children right away in the hostel for schooling which they regard it as a better place. But there are three disadvantages: Firstly, they miss the attachment with their parents. Secondly, they are confused with their faith in Christ. Thirdly, they build closer relationship and attachment with people of bad influence.
It is advisable that children should be with their parents till eighteen years of age. Nothing is better than a child being raised by the mother. Mothers are the best teacher for children and separation from mothers at a young age can give many disadvantages. Fathers should seek God’s wisdom and take up the responsibility in training up his child himself at home rather than Hostel.
2. 19-22 years of age:
19-22 years of age is a crucial stage: the time of entering College and a desire to live an independent life. At such juncture, it is therefore advisable that they should be under the care and control of their parents with the exception of Theological College Hostel and Hostels that focuses on the spiritual life where the children would be nurtured spiritually, sometimes even better than their mothers at home. Truly speaking till 22 years of age they should not go out independently because they are still immature to have self discipline and self control. Remember at this age they are on the cross road, so if the parent are not wise enough to take care of them they are prone to go to a wrong direction of no return. After the child is spoiled the parents will tear their hearts but it would be too late and the child will ended up with chaos. Therefore, parents should not yield to their child insistence by taking the hasty decision and send them out far away from them.
3. 23-35 years of age:
After Graduate to till their Ph.D, i.e., 23-35 years of age, parents can release them from the bondage of control. Now they are mature, now they will discipline themselves and be so wise to mingle with the world. This is a challenging period where they will either die with the world or survive and become leaders of the world; now it will depend on the individual. Parents now should not have to panic or worry because they have given their best in their children’s early years therefore now relax knowing that in this period they will take care of themselves and unnecessary tension should be avoided. Because you have brought him/her up so well, this is the stage that you believe in them and uphold your children in your prayers.
Now let us reason together, why Nagaland students who achieved top rankings failed to succeed or continue their studies and rather returned home? Why those who seemed to be sincere and outstanding characters returned home and shattered their parents? It is not only committed by the secular students but the theological students as well. Unexpectedly some Theological students are found as black sheep, but as a Principal of the Bible College, I discovered that many if not almost all are found as excellent people. Some unfortunate black sheep students are those who were not trained in the way of the Lord. Hence, outwardly they seem to be succeeding and flourishing but inwardly they struggle with the world, they do not walk with the Lord but living in secret sins, their private lives filled with drugs, alcohol and sexual immorality. Academically, they topped but actually they ventured out empty (without Christ) to various parts of India and the world and returned with full of wickedness, failure and frustration. “What can men do without Christ? He’d only fall and fall and fall again.”
Dear Parents of today take the right step and mould up your children in the way of the Lord from their very early age. If you could train up your child in such a way then they will never depart from the living God. Nevertheless until they are 22 years of age let them be with you, keep your eyes on them and use the remote to control them. This age is just as if standing on a cross road so do not throw them far away from you like a stone. If you do not take a wise decision then you will soon be surprised to know that your child is alcoholic, drug user and it will trembled you that your child is living in immorality like a prostitute. Definitely they will return home with frustration but you will get blame because you have failed to play a father’s role / a mother’s role. If you do not seek God’s wisdom to train up or take care of your children, then your children will become the victims who will live in desperate condition throughout his / her life. Concerning your children 23 years of age and above, leave them alone support them with your prayers. Now they are mature, let the almighty God take care of them.
