Going back and coming back
Liba Hopeson, BTC, Pfutsero
JOURNEYING through life after accepting Christ is not easy. We walk in the narrow road that many do not go. In this tricky path, we come across hurdles after hurdles and problems after problems. Thus many desist treading or give up on the half-way. Though we have accepted Christ as our Lord and Savior, we continue to wrestle with numerous adversaries, among which, our desire is one main foe. We combat with the temptations, attacks of the evil forces and many other things of the world. Sometimes, the pull of the world is so intense that we tend to waver and shake our faith. At times, due to mounting adversities, problems, enticements and desires, we tend to backslide and turn away from God. There are times we go on our own way. The forces of the world become so strong sometimes that, we fail to give priority to God, our Creator.
The difficulties we come across on the way are enormous and hence challenging. What keeps us going forward despite of all these obstacles and attacks? There are different reasons that make me moving forward. One significant thing is, remembering and reflecting back the time I surrendered my life to God. Though the evil forces assail me and the world tempt me in a very attractive way that my desire become very strong, I’m pulled back by the thought of my commitment to God.
I could clearly remember the time I poured my heart to God, confessed my sins and declared that I would follow Him in any circumstances and serve Him. I remember how tears came out from my eyes, as I realized my unworthiness in the sight of God.
I become like Prophet Isaiah who become so low and humbled when he realized his unrighteousness and sins. Significantly, I experienced something amazing, which nobody can know and I cannot explain precisely how it happened, as it was of the Spirit. I felt something very different, which I believe, many who have dedicated their life to Christ have experienced too. That was the moment I made a promise that I will live for Him till my last breath, though attaining perfection is not possible.
Thinking back about this precious moment is extremely valuable for me. When the world calls me to do something which is not according to God’s will, the memory of my commitment rings in my mind and heart that I have committed my life to God. When Satan tempt me to do something which can make me stumble in a disastrous way, the remembrance of the moment committing my life to God pulls me back. So, I could withstand.
When my own desires lure me and attack me, so that what are not alright seems ok or fine, the thought of my commitment to God take hold of me and make me stand. So, when my spiritual life is at stake, I go back to time I committed my life to Christ. And when I do this, I come back to Christ-consciousness. This precious memory – recalling the moment of committing my life to Christ – brings me back to Christ.
Yes, I make mistakes. I backslide. I stumble and fall. I stray and get lost sometime. I should admit it. But I don’t stay long in such deserted places. I come home – ‘the home of Christ’. One of the reasons that I could come to my Master is that, I always try to recollect the moment I gave my life to Him. It was a very historic, great and memorable episode in my life.
It teaches me, reminds me, controls me and pulls me back to my Savior. So, when I’m stuck up in this world – I go back to another world – the world of the time of dedication of my life. It actually brings me back to Christ. I call this recollection a ‘life giving recollection’. It is so precious for me.