Growth through habits

If you have ever looked up terms like ‘imposter syndrome’, ‘people-pleasing’, and ‘procrastination’, and felt as if the descriptions perfectly matched your habits and behaviour, you might have felt discouraged. It takes an immense amount of practice and patience to cultivate an outlook that enables you to see the silver lining in any dark cloud. But most things are easier said than done. This adage holds especially true when we have to scrape for anything that could remotely resemble optimism while dealing with the bad hands life deals us from time to time.

As someone once joked, “I might suspect a deadly disease, but unless I see a doctor and receive a diagnosis, I will dismiss it as a simple flu treatable with warm water and paracetamol.” Once our bad habits are labelled, they transform from simple tendencies into afflictions or illnesses. From that point, we begin to lose control over these habits, feeling powerless to change them, often accepting them as integral parts of ourselves. Dealing with life’s challenges is not easy. However, understanding and recognising these behaviours is the first step to making positive changes. I am not a psychologist, so I won’t advice on how to handle them, but I am incredibly optimistic. I believe there is always a silver lining, even when dealing with challenging habits.

Let’s discuss imposter syndrome –  It is that persistent, nagging voice in the back of your mind that insists you are not good enough and that someone else deserves your achievements more than you do. It is that feeling of self-doubt that can creep in despite the evidence of your competence and success. As I mentioned, I am not a therapist, so I won’t tell you ways to cope with it. However, I can shed light on the potential positive aspects associated with imposter syndrome. If you are dealing with imposter syndrome, it often means you are setting high standards and striving for excellence to prove yourself deserving of the praise and results. This commitment drives you to produce high-quality work and encourages meticulous planning to ensure that the steps you follow are as smooth and efficient as possible, yielding optimal results. Moreover, experiencing imposter syndrome can cultivate empathy towards others who face similar challenges. In addition to this, experiencing imposter syndrome can also make you resilient. Constantly battling feelings of self-doubt requires you to develop strategies to cope with and counteract these thoughts. Overtime, this can build your mental and emotional resilience.

People-pleasing can feel like a full-time job where you work tirelessly, exhausting all your resources and leaving little to nothing for yourself. It is often described as the inability to say no. Do you frequently find yourself drained and in uncomfortable situations because you could not refuse a request? Perhaps you planned a weekend of rest but ended up at a party for a friend’s acquaintance, someone you met only once. Or maybe you have been overburdened with work because you could not decline taking on extra tasks from a colleague who had other unavoidable commitments.

Despite the challenges, there are positive aspects to being a people-pleaser too. This trait often means you are empathetic, kind, and considerate of others’ feelings. You excel at building relationships and creating a supportive environment. People feel comfortable around you and see you as dependable and trustworthy. Your willingness to take on additional work can enhance your time management skills, helping you streamline tasks to become more efficient and effective.

Procrastination is a term we are all too familiar with. It refers to delaying tasks and decisions, often opting for less urgent or easier activities instead- like spending hours scrolling through Instagram reels and YouTube videos. Procrastination can feel like that friend who always walks around singing “Qué Será Será, Whatever Will Be, Will Be.” It lulls you into a sense of passive resignation until the very last moment, when you are left to handle the consequences all by yourself. Despite its pitfalls, procrastination can also have a positive side. It provides extra time to prepare and come up with better ideas. For some, working under pressure actually enhances focus and productivity. These people are more focused and productive when they have a deadline to meet. Moreover, procrastination can help prioritise tasks, forcing you to distinguish between urgent and less critical responsibilities.

See, struggling with these bad habits is not always a bad thing. These behaviours, while often seen as negative, can have silver linings. Imposter syndrome drives us to set high standards. People-pleasing can foster empathy, while procrastination can lead us to focus better under pressure. By understanding and managing these tendencies, we can turn them into strengths rather than weaknesses. Recognising the positives in these behaviours allows us to harness their potential benefits while working towards balance and self-care. Remember it is not about eliminating these traits entirely, but about learning to navigate them in a way that supports our growth and well-being.